Halloween Dress Rehearsal

Tonight is the dress rehearsal for my concert. I have a feeling the ladies will have to use music on the Palestrina. We will try it tonight without music. But I would rather have them reference their music and sing it well as opposed to miss entrances, words, and rhythms because they do not know it well enough. I think tonight's rehearsal will require a lot of focus. It's Halloween and even one woman asked me last week if rehearsal would go the entire time. I told her to plan on it. I might let them out a little early, but only if it is a good, focused rehearsal. And we need to have a good 2 hours of rehearsal tonight. On Friday I e-mailed out part recordings for two of their new songs. I hope they use them.

I wish I could start the semester over with them. There would be a few things I would be more demanding on. The concert will go well- the women will sound nice. I am excited (and motivated) to work hard on our Winter Festival pieces.

We had our choir concert this past Saturday. It went well. I am very excited that I am at this program. It was easy to remember why I chose to come to this school as I was singing and specifically while I was watching my teacher conduct the other group.

I am also feeling very motivated to improve my own conducting.

Master Thesis

So a rather academically eventful last 36 hours.

Yesterday I met with my graduate advisor and planned out most of my time here. My last semester will hopefully be lighter so I can take my (4 credits worth) master thesis. We spoke a little about my master thesis. Actually, for MM scholars, it's called a "Project Report", since we have to do a recital project. Our paper is based on an aspect of our recital. I do not need to be extremely specific yet, but I will work on my thesis proposal in research methods this semester. I am hoping to do something about an early woman composer. Perhaps Madalena Casulana, Francesca Caccini, Barbara Strozzi, or a few others are potential composers. Yesterday I was very interested in Caccini, but after talking to my graduate advisory and my research methods teacher (both are early music scholars), I am more interested in Strozzi. In my dream world, I would fly away to some European country (all on a grant, of course, so it would cost next to nothing) and uncover an old manuscript no one has seen since the woman composer wrote it. However, since the likelihood of my stumbling upon an old manuscript is slim-to-none, I would settle for taking a Strozzi manuscript (apparently much of her stuff has not been edited yet) and put it into a performance edition. This song would then be performed on my recital. And I would do a lot of research on the piece itself. That research might require some travel... If I must travel to Italy to do real research, then I must! John suggested I look at some cheaper options first.

Today had potential to be a rough day. But it turned out okay. I was late to the conducting class I assist with- for a reason that was entirely my fault and inexcusable. I simply lost track of time and got there 3 minutes late.

I had my conducting lesson today as well. I had a hunch it would not go well. For the past week, I have not known what to practice with my conducting. And it's not because I'm an expert conductor. So this told me that I did not know what to look for- which also meant I was probably doing something poorly and just not recognizing it. So I went to my lesson- and sure enough, multiple things were corrected. A few times I came close to tears. The criticism was not too harsh, but I was very frustrated. I had to remind myself that I would get nowhere if I gave in to the frustration, but that I should focus on the task at hand. That helped me refocus. In times like that, I also like to remind myself that progress is slow- I will not be an expert overnight. At the end of the lesson, I conducted two measures and my teacher stopped me. The accompanist in the room nodded and said, "Yes. That was amazing." I conducted the two measures once more, and again my teacher stopped me. He said, "That was beautiful and clear. That was professional level conducting. Make sure you footnote me when you are into your professional career." We all laughed at that, but it was quite a compliment.

I also need to remind myself: I came here to get better at my gesture. It is okay if there are growing pains. And I do need to work hard. If I don't, this is a waste of my time and money.

The day went on. And it ended up being a good day. Everything I thought I was going to be disappointed in turned out okay. We were given a surprise quiz in Research Methods on a book she had told us to look at a few weeks earlier. The book included writing tips. I skimmed through it but realized it was just good writing technique, so did not spend time taking notes, highlighting, etc. I was worried about the quiz and got a 13.5 out of 15 on it. In my mind, if it's not a perfect score or close to it, it just is not good enough. Turns out I got the 2nd highest score in the class- and received a prize (a ruler with a list of musicians). My friend Grace received the highest score, earning 14 out of 15. I was quite excited about this. I told John this story after class and he called me (I think he was teasing but I'm going to pretend he was being sweet) his cute little bookworm.

The second I walked into conducting late today I thought, "This could be a bad day. I can't let it be." And what do you know? It turned out to be a productive, positive day.

Saturday Night Concert- Other types of Music

While others were there to see Social Distortion, we were there to see the Avett Brothers. We were pretty far back on the lawn, but we were at the very front of the lawn.

Below, we are getting psyched to see the Brothers! I am wearing my cowgirl hat (bought in Escanaba, MI) in support of the Avett Brothers.
Below is what the inside of the Verizon Amphitheater looks like. There were two bands before the Avett Brothers
On the way up to the lawn seats, I snapped a picture of a portion of the park outside the amphitheater.
And, here is the entrance.

Surprise Rehearsal

Tuesday I was asked to come up and conduct in choir. This was unexpected- and it was a song I have not conducted before. It was great. My teacher gave me a little feedback and I tried what he wanted. After rehearsal, he told me I did a great job and his compliment was so genuine. It was nice to hear.

My teacher was gone yesterday and will be gone today. He has a big festival he's conducting this weekend and is immersed in rehearsals and logistical decisions.

Yesterday I taught undergrad conducting. I was asked to put together a lesson plan covering the concepts they had read about over a month ago. I had a three page lesson plan. We made it through not quite half. A lot of questions were asked and hopefully things were clarified. There was a fire drill during the class period, so we lost about 10 minutes of class time. It was fun and I think I would really enjoy teaching conducting.

After class, I saw a friend (who also happens to be the undergrad choral office assistant) and asked her if she knew what was happening in choir, since our teacher was not there. Her response was, "Yes, he sent out an e-mail. You're in charge of the first 50 minutes of rehearsal." The e-mail had went to my junk box. She printed off the e-mail for me and I mentally prepared myself for the rehearsal. In warm-ups, I wanted to make them aware of two things: Vowel alignment and intonation. Their pitch rarely was an issue in the songs I was conducting, but I knew that later in rehearsal when the other choral grad student took over, he would work hard on intonation. Or rather, have the choir work on listening.

In the second piece I worked on, the choir was asked to sing a lot of things softly. But intensely. And it was a different experience working with a group that had a wide range of dynamics. It made me think about how finding an ensemble's true "piano" would help open up possibilities of expression. I do not think I demand true "piano" from a group often. Yesterday was different and it was well worth it.

I also had the group sing through the first movement of Rutter's Gloria. That's the one I am conducting at the beginning of December. I thought we would have plenty of time to work on things. But we didn't and I ended up singing past mistakes they would have fixed had there been time.

It's cool here today. I'm going to put on a sweatshirt for my run.

Baton Introduction

2:00 in the afternoon and it's perfect weather for a run. The sun is bright, the breeze is strong, and being near the ocean makes the temperature cool. The path was not crowded, which is strange for a weekend. And I listened to a This American Life interview with Brad Pitt.

I received an e-mail today from my research methods professor. She was reminding us of our assignment due on Tuesday, and in it she asked for something this week that is due next week. Either that or her wording is very unclear. This kind of thing drives me nuts.

I have started practicing my conducting with a baton. After Rejoice in the Lamb, the next thing we will be working in lessons on is the John Rutter Gloria. I do not know what we will be doing after that, but my teacher has mentioned a few other pieces to me. There are a lot of things I like about a baton. My left hand feels different when my right hand is holding a baton. The two function differently and those functions are a lot easier to separate when one hand has a fiberglass extension. I also have less tension in my right shoulder when I conduct with a baton. Perhaps it's a mental state: I think my arms has to work less because the baton is clarifying for me. It's not quite that simple. In reality, I am probably conducting with too much tension without the baton.

Now I am waiting for the (very expensive) John Rutter full score I ordered. At the end of my masters I will have a nice little collection of scores.

Fog in the Afternoon

I had my voice lesson on Wednesday and my teacher said something to me that will be very helpful. He asked me if I listened to myself when I practice and I said yes. He replied, "Don't." Don't listen to myself sing- focus on the technique. I have heard this before but it's never really sunk in. I listen for things and try to fix and it causes tension (and ultimately frustration). I think this will be really helpful.

Spring Semester Class

There is a class that I want to sign up for during Spring semester. I found out this morning it will count toward my degree as a history, although I would be willing to take it as an elective. It combines what has long been the time period that fascinates me the most with women composers and the role of gender. The class is a Baroque semester and is: Courts and Convents, Courtesans and Castrati: Music and gender in early modern Europe.

My research methods professor is teaching it next semester. One of our assignments for this week is to spend some time with a scholarly article (and answer a bunch of questions about it). We have the get the article approved by her and I found three articles I was interested in- one about Francesca Caccini and two about Barbara Strozzi. Either way, I'll probably read all the articles since I am interested in the topic. When my professor e-mailed me back to give me the "verdict" on the articles, she also mentioned the class she was teaching. I am really excited about this class.

I read the e-mail before my run this morning. As I was running, I started thinking about my interest in women composers, which led me to think about women conductors. Conducting is a relatively young profession for women- but who were some of the first prominent women conductors? Or, have there really been prominent women conductors? If not, what women first decided they wanted to conduct and how did they get there? What was that first rehearsal like? I bet it was not co-ed. But what about the first co-ed rehearsal?

These are things I'd like to explore.

Pre-Ordered iPhone

I have decided I need to dedicate time to standing in front of the mirror and conducting. You might say, "But haven't you already done that?" And the answer is yes, yes I have. But I don't schedule in practice time. I practice here and there when I have time. 10 minutes at night, 15 minutes in the morning, etc. And now that I have had my first conducting lesson, I know more things to look for. Thousands of hours- that's what it will take to really become a master. I'm not sure if I'll get thousands and thousands of hours of conducting in during my masters, but I hope to get close to that.

Much of my homework is done. I have a little to do this weekend for two classes, but it will not be extremely tough. This is great, because I really look forward to spending time with John this weekend- exploring CA and getting more familiar with the area.

Conducting Lesson

I had my first full conducting lesson. Finally. Very glad about this.

We worked on some things to help with clarity of gesture. In the slower sections I was subdividing by relaxing my wrist slightly. I din't realize I was doing this. I don't know when the subdivision crept in the gesture... I didn't see it when I practiced in front of the mirror. I practiced my subdivision at the beginning of the year, although not while working on Rejoice in the Lamb. At any rate, I was able to get a good look at my gesture without the subdivision, so that's helpful.

What I liked about the lesson was the quick feedback from my teacher and the fact I was able to make quick fixes. I was a little worried he would ask me to do something and I wouldn't be able to fix/change it on the spot. But, at least in this lesson, that was not the case. The lesson will help me focus on some specific things. Time to put in the practice so that at my next lesson, I can show improvement.

We made it through almost half of the Britten. So we'll finish that... and then we're going to start on the Rutter Gloria. He would like me to buy the full score- which I found for $109 on Amazon. I suppose I need to get used to the idea that I need to buy scores. Or rather, John and I need to get used to the idea that we will be buying scores. It does encourage me to not spend money on books for other classes if I don't have to get them. I won't purchase any suggested material- and if I don't need the required material, I won't get it.

I am already thinking about classes for next semester. We are just about halfway through this semester. The undergrads are all taking midterms this week and next week.

I still do not know what my final project/test is going to be at the end of my masters. I have been thinking about that. I think I give a recital (put on a concert) and I heard the other day I take an audio test. A choral song is played and my job is to say what the song is, who it is by, and give the background of the piece and the composer. But I do not actually know any of this for certain. I'll know more when I meet with the graduate advisor in a couple of weeks. By the way, I think the graduate advisor is awesome.

Effusive

Rehearsal went so well tonight. There were moments of really good music making. And my two outer sections can really blend. The soprano 1 ladies really sing together well- with a beautiful, clear, light sound. And I could take more confidence from my alto 2 ladies, but they certainly know how to sing as a section.

The pacing of the rehearsal was good as well.

Sometimes it is so overwhelming to be in front of a group of singers. The desire to be the best teacher and clearest conductor is so strong. That's what they deserve- singers who want to make music and be proud of it. Sometimes I am not very clear in what I want to say- I need to be more succinct. The problem with enjoying my job is sometimes I become effusive with love for music, for the group, for life. Sometimes I just need to stop talking. But I hope I never lose that pure excitement for singers that are learning and are enjoying coming together as a group.

Tomorrow is a big day- Apple will hopefully announce the upcoming release of a new iPhone. I'm ready.