Mass Rehearsal Day Two

Tonight's mass rehearsal went well. We did a run through of the Rutter with the brass while the choirs sang from the spot they will sing in this weekend. It went okay. I have a few things to practice, but I think it will go well. The choir got behind and then the organist rushed and it fell apart in the middle. But when we restarted the section with me being in firm control of the tempo (and letting the organist know he rushed- well my teacher did that), it went fine. It was so overwhelming. I was exhausted after that one song. 250 voices and a brass choir... it took a lot of focus and I almost couldn't think because there were so many things to listen for: brass and percussion entrances, various choral entrances, shaping the line in the newly decided upon three patten, an organ, plus the choirs are in front of me and in the balcony on both sides of me. My gesture needs to be a little bigger but clear and crisp. I had to sit down for a moment after I finished tonight.

I am getting close to being done with Christmas shopping! Just a few gifts to decide on yet... I love Christmas!

Tempo... I always start with the tempo marking in the music (if there is one) or with the tempo/style description word. Assuming that the composer and/or arranger knows what they are doing (which I like to assume), then I trust the marking and go with that. Depending on the style and the song, there is probably going to be a little give-and-take. Sometimes if the tempo seems not to work for the group, I will make a change. However, even when the tempo seems to not work, I double check the articulation and the emphasis. Example: The ladies could not seem to settle into portions of their tempo in Virgin Mary Had a Baby Boy. Put the emphasis on 2 and 4 instead of 1 and 3, then boom! The song has a different feel and the tempo settles. And sometimes, it just takes the choir's focus.

Mass Rehearsal Day One

We had our first Winter Festival rehearsal tonight. And after the very warm, tiring group rehearsal I had a Women's Choir rehearsal. They did well, although I am just a little worried that they are not as prepared as they could be. I know they can sing these songs so musically, but I am just not sure if they will. We just did not have a lot of time on them. However, I think they will give a performance that will still be good.

I have some work to do this week on my movement of the Rutter. It is a bit frustrating. I have spent so much time on this song and I cannot seem to find a way of conducting it that meets expectations of my teacher and the brass conductor, shows shape of the line, and is something I can easily change. Every change I make I spend hours practicing- and again today I changed how I conduct the Rutter. After a rehearsal with the brass, I realized I need to show the utmost clarity. Many of my ways of showing line to the choir now has to change because I really cannot really deviate from a three pattern. I am thinking so much in rehearsals about what my gesture is showing that my ears are not listening as well and I am not as good of a teacher when we stop and I give feedback. Perhaps this is part of the learning process, but I wish it did not take so long. Early on in the process, my teacher kept adding or changing things about my gesture and how I was showing things. Then he would change his mind. In my last lesson I really made some good progress and it seemed that my gesture was settling into what was going to be the clearest.

In the end, I believe I will do an okay job and the choirs will sing well. It has just been a very windy process that I want to stream line in the future. I know the learning IS a process, but I would like it to be a more efficient one.

I also should probably make sure I get a good night of sleep. Morning comes early on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

Clarity of Tempo Lesson

Tonight my singers wrote evaluations for me. I don't know if I will get any of the feedback. I know we didn't look at it before we turned it in (and were not supposed to).

The ladies have had some great rehearsals. Tonight being no different. Their winter concert is coming up quickly and they have been excellent progress on their songs, especially since their fall concert. We still have things to do, but I am not worried about making good music.

After rehearsal I spent some time thinking about how I address sacred topics on choir. I am very careful not to dwell too much on one religious belief. Many times I turn it into something generic- instead of thinking about how beautiful the feet are that announce Christ, we talk about what we do when we hear good news. I mention the context and sometimes have asked for thoughts, but I also know there are a variety of faiths in my group. Although I believe the ladies are respectful and understand why we talk about sacred topics. When singing "Virgin Mary Had a Baby Boy", we shared the joy of spreading good news and announcing amazing things that happen. The trick was how to put it into context of the nativity story. I think most expressed this well. I normally travel home with one of the girls in the choir (who lives near me). We talked about this on the way home tonight- she was surprised to think of some of the girls not believing in God. But also understand why I often did have an in-depth discussion on religious topics. In all honesty, the ladies could probably have a conversation about the birth of Jesus, but we do not have time for it and I don't want to risk some of the ladies checking out because they cannot relate.

I also realized tonight that I was getting in the way of myself. "Ma Navu" is taken at quarter note equals 50. In certain parts the ladies like to slow it down even more than that. And the past two rehearsals I was trying to figure out why they wouldn't follow me when I was working so hard to pull them back to tempo. However, that was the whole problem. While I thought I was being clear, I wasn't. Tonight I stood up straight, kept my rebound steady and trusted that they would be with me on the ictus. And they were- and on the rare occasion they weren't, it was often fixed on the next beat.

Then I had this beautiful lesson taught to me. At the end of the piece, I was listening and trying to give certain parts cues. But it was too much and the ladies were not clean. Three or four times they sang the end and were not clean. So finally, I decided not to listen and to just be a counting machine. I focused on clarity of tempo without much musical effusiveness in my gesture. Guess what? It was not only cleaner but also more musical. Great lesson. And glad I learned that now.

Tomorrow I have my conducting lesson. And I am going to the band to teach them a French pavane they are singing during a song. Their director asked me to come in for 15/20 minutes. Should be fun... even trying to pronounce the French.

Thanksgiving Week

Next to me is the soprano book from Barbara Strozzi's Il Primo Libro de Madrigali. After I sign off for tonight, I will look at it before I go to bed and maybe begin transcribing.

My studio is having mock juries the first week of December. It's during my lesson time so I really can't skip it. This means I will probably have to perform. And that makes me VERY nervous. I have not sung in preparation for being graded for years. Did I mention it makes me nervous? You know, singing is different when it is not being "judged". I always felt like juries were a one shot deal- have a bad singing day or being unfocused and all the work you did for the semester goes down the tubes. So, I guess the point is... it makes me nervous.

It is a short week. I have Wednesday off of school- which means Thanksgiving prep. And hopefully some homework. I would like to work it out so that all I have to do over Thanksgiving weekend is looking at my vocal pieces and conducting pieces.

I also am in the process of beginning my final project for Research Methods, which is a master thesis proposal. I have a lot of basic information down and need to fill in the blanks before I actually start researching sources. I do not like the paragraph I have written, but I plan on the paragraph changing over the next year.

Speaking of Thanksgiving, one of the many reasons I am excited about the holiday is because we will decorate for Christmas on Thanksgiving morning!

Strozzi Facsimile Publication

I have a facsimile of Il Primo Libro de Madrigali by Barbara Strozzi. It is my research professor's facsimile. I am hoping to get my own copy. I just need to figure out where to find it. I can't seem to find a place in America that sells it.

At any rate, this is my new task.

True energized piano

I just had a wonderful and surreal experience. I came home in between choir and my evening class to work out. When I run toward downtown along the bike path, I can see the downtown skyline. I was listening to a Fresh Air about multiverses, instead of the universe. I really don't mean to turn all SG-1 in this blog, but it was neat to hear this scientist talk about the mathematically supported hypothesis of multiverse. He was illustrating a point by talking about the shape of the earth and comparing that to a shape of a universe (and the implications that would have). Do you ever have those moments where you think you can briefly understand the bigness of something? It happens, it's overwhelming, and you lose the feeling. But at the same time, it's almost as if you got to experience something awesome. In a way it's what I sometimes experience in music- for a moment you experience something bigger than yourself. And far from being scary, it's inspiring. I just wish I could hold onto the feeling longer.

Today we started recording a new composition. This is unlike anything I have done. At Luther, we made recordings of demo CDs for new music. This is a composition by a San Francisco Bay area composer. It's a new age-y type of music encompassing the philosophy of the life and death of things in nature... things that come into harmony with each other and then fight against each other. Mistakes were made and instead of correcting them, his response was, "Well, it sounded cool. So if it sounds cool with the other tracks, we'll use it." It certainly is a creative process. I don't think I could be a composer. I'm glad there are people suited to this- lest we would not have new music.

My friend Austen posted on a previous blog and posed the question "How does a conductor achieve an energized piano dynamic?" Great question! I have been thinking a lot about this too. As much as I would like to just will an energized piano dynamic into being, it will not happen. First, I have to set the demand by asking for it but keeping the energy up. I do this by asking for forward/surging energy without a crescendo. I also play around with how I show this in my gesture. Some gestures work better than others. The one I really like to tap into is a sort of t'ai chi gesture. Now, I know nothing about t'ai chi. I don't even think I know exactly what it is. If you asked me, I would say a lot of "um"s and maybe say something about movement and breath. We had a guest conductor a month or so ago. He was a CSU alum and went to undergrad with my teacher. He demanded our choir sing a true piano. It took multiple tries, great support, and intense focus, but we got there. So I have at times used some of the things I used from him, including a contained, low, centered, "rounded" gesture. Sometimes my ladies can't get to it. Sometimes I am not demanding enough. There are moments when they do really well but not quite a true energized piano. And sometimes I let it slide. Sometimes not. I should be more consistent.

The answer is: I don't know always to get a true energized piano. But I'm working on how to get there. I think that is one of the differences between choirs that sound good and choirs that affect us on levels we can't describe.

Addressing Those Around Us

It was a good, focused rehearsal tonight. I am relieved that most of the rehearsals are strong and focused. Tonight was especially hard because we had so much to get done. Other than work on our own pieces, we also had our guitarist come in. Then the mens chorus came in for the last 45 minutes to work with us on the joint pieces. It was long and vocally demanding.

I never know how to address professors. Having taught for five years, I learned to start thinking of everyone by their first name. I found that when I thought of someone as a "Mr." or "Mrs./Ms.", at times it was difficult to work collaboratively and feel comfortable/confident speaking up in meetings. In front of students, I called them by their title, but not in conversation. Now at graduate school, it is a bit of a strange situation. No matter what, I always call a professor by their title in front of undergrads. Normally in a classroom setting with graduate students as well- out of habit and formality in a structured setting. In a casual setting, my tendency is to think of professors as people- and thus by their first names. I call my teacher by his first name unless we are in front of students.

Perhaps at one point I needed to call professors by their official titles to understand their position as an educator. I really do not feel that how I address someone affects how I view them now. If anything, a professor that insists on being called by their title in all situations I will probably think is pretentious. When I become a professor (notice "when", not "if"), I will probably want undergraduates to call me by "professor" for a few reasons that I am perhaps a little too tired to explain clearly at the moment. I'm not so keen on "Dr". I will certainly not insist my colleagues call me anything other than my first name and if there are graduate students at my school, I will not ask that they do either. Although I think I want to work at an institution that is undergraduate only. I have only just begun to think about that.

I may change my mind on all this as I am in the profession longer. But I don't think so.

Winter Festival

Rehearsal for tomorrow night is planned. It is mid-November and crunch time is right about to hit. We have two rehearsals left before our dress rehearsal week for Winter Festival. Tomorrow evening our guitar accompanist is coming to rehearsal. The school currently does not have a harpist, so we are using a nylon string guitar. The women sing from one of the balconies and the piano is on the floor, which would make me a little nervous in the rhythmically demanding "This Little Babe". After the guitarist practices with the women, the mens chorus is coming to join us so we can sing through the mass pieces. It will be a full rehearsal.

I am excited about the music that I programmed for Winter Festival. The women will begin with a song entitled "Ma Navu", based on Isaiah 57:2. It's melody is based on an Israeli folk tune. The woman who arranged this piece, Barbara Wolfman, is a former colleague of mine. It has been a real blessing to hear her thoughts on the piece, certain things to focus on, and have explained clearly the textual ideas. We have been loosely singing this song for three, but really spent some time on it the past two weeks. Tomorrow the big focus will be to solidify dynamics (specifically when it is piano), be intentional about articulation, and listening to vowels.

The second piece the ladies will sing is actually a combination of two pieces from Benjamin Britten's Ceremony of Carols. They will sing "As Dew in Aprille", followed by "This Little Babe". The ladies have been working on this for about four or five weeks. "This Little Babe" has created a bit of an obstacle with verses two and three, but last week the ladies did an excellent job on this. Tomorrow night the demand will be on dynamics (again, specifically when it is piano) and getting the crescendos to be paced in the most effective manner. Every once in awhile someone will still breath in the wrong place or end the song by closing their mouth (cutting out the potential for the ending to ring). Actually, it is normally just one person that forgets, but we're working on it.

The last piece is a song entitled "Virgin Mary Had a Baby Boy" by Stephen Hatfield. We will spend quite a bit of time on this tomorrow evening. The third section in this piece asks for varying rhythm and text for all four parts. Intense counting and focus were required last week to begin learning this section and I suspect we'll have to relearn parts of it- but it will not be entirely unfamiliar. Since this piece is the newest, the focus tomorrow will be to correct stray notes (especially in that third section), implement some of the easy dynamics (and again, I will focus on the piano), and the warmth of sound.

I have been thinking a lot about dynamics. Not forte (loud or "strong", rather)... but piano (quiet). Many choirs (including all my choirs from the past five years) can do forte very well. Mezzo-forte, forte range... great. Mezzo-piano was normally the quietest I would demand. But listening to my teacher talk and being inspired by a guest conductor we had one time, I have come to appreciate the difficulty of singing a true piano with good support and energized sound. It is very easy to sing something piano but with no energy. And I am finally working with a group that can, with some effort, get to a beautiful and energized piano sound. It takes a lot of work to get there. It takes a lot of determined focus and demands from me as well.

If anyone is interested in seeing the YouTube channel for the music school, let me know and I can give you a link. None of the things I have conducted are up yet, but they will be eventually.

Running With a New Name

We had our choir concert on Saturday night. I am very proud of the ladies. More on that at a later date.

I went for a run this morning and followed a different path than normal. I had an incident with a strange old man and then when I got home, there was a pony outside of the apartment complex. It was standing by a truck and was certainly not a sight I expected to see.

I received an e-mail from my research methods professor this morning. She talked about my master thesis. I am still excited about it. As I was thinking about submitting proposals and doing research, it hit me that my research would stretch across two years- and in between those two years I would acquire a new last name. I want to be intentional about submitting any proposals or requests that I will need next year under my new last name. Hence, I will be discussing both with my research methods professor and my graduate advisor what to submit with my new last name.

Rebound and Experimentation

Yesterday in choir I conducted the first movement of the Rutter Gloria. I had the advantage of teaching it in undergrad conducting yesterday morning. So I was very aware that I had to practice what I preached. The problem is, I am not exactly sure how I want to conduct this. I will have lessons on it (Tuesday is my first lesson on it). But the tempo is quick (60 equals a dotted half note). And I like that tempo. I start by conducting it in three, but quickly change to a super metric 1 pattern. My teacher has a saying: "Don't do in more when you can do in less."

But the problem is I can't stay in 1. Even if I wanted to keep the tempo completely rigid the entire time, my teacher wants me to relax the tempo at a certain section. So to have more control over the tempo, I will switch back to three... And then of course, back to 1 later when we are back at the bright, "leggerio" tempo. So having made some decisions, I went into choir yesterday. We have read it through 3 or 4 times now, although we have not spent a lot of time on it. Last time they sang it, I pushed the tempo. They drag terribly. They learned it at a slower tempo and want to keep it there. So I set the new tempo- or rather, the right tempo.

And for the first time ever, I switched my gesture mid conducting to help the choir. I didn't tell them or even think much of it. There were times I had to switch back to three to keep them on top of the tempo. So as much as it was frustrating, it was also exciting that I am starting to make changes in my gesture to help. My conducting is becoming a tool for effective rehearsal. And that is why I am in grad school! Well, and to get a degree so I can get a job I want.

I also received a message from an undergraduate who said watching me gave them some new ideas to try.

I went into the rehearsal with a gesture I wanted to try. When the choir needed help, I experimented with my gesture.

I also know that I did some things poorly yesterday. I had practiced it, and so I was frustrated that it did not work in rehearsal. But it also reinforced how important the rebound is. A conductor can begin accelerandos or ritardanos by the rebound. It can also cause your choir to rush or slow down if your rebound is steady or does not have a height that makes sense to the tempo. That is what I am most aware of now.

Class Canceled

I wish I could treat all my free time as precious as I treat it when a class is canceled. My research methods professor is terribly ill and canceled class tonight. So I was done with my day at 3. I got home about 4 (when the bus dropped me off), went for a run, came back and practiced (or rather tried to memorize "If God Be For Us, Who Can Be Against Us" for lessons tomorrow), and just finished eating. When I'm done writing this, I will practice conducting and later on do a little Beethoven analysis. I do not particularly like having a class canceled, but I thought I would make the most of it.

I was very relieved today. We were singing through the 2nd and 3rd movement of John Rutter's Gloria. And my teacher mentioned that while Rutter is good at capturing moments and making the most of things, but he uses all his tricks... in every song. He continued on and said he probably would not want to attend a concert of just Rutter music. I am glad for this. I like John Rutter, but I would not want to a song of his every year. It's nice stuff- in moderation.

I cannot believe it is November.